Fighting for Joy
Never surrender
NOTE: This week’s essay is combined with a bit of a commercial. I rarely do that, but I hope you’ll indulge me.
In two weeks, I’m going to deliver a keynote at an International Women’s Day (IWD) event here in Central Florida. The title is “Fighting for Joy.”
The full day event features three keynote speakers; I’m the closer. The program primarily focuses on small business owners, with panels for legal matters, finance issues, wellness, and one with authors—all of whom have written business books. I’m the only author on the panel who writes romance novels.
When the event first put out a call for speakers, I wondered if I were qualified—if my experience mattered for this audience of 100+ women, most of whom are entrepreneurs. Other speakers have advanced degrees and are superstars in their fields. After lengthy consideration, I decided to throw my hat in the ring, sending in all the requisite elements (bio, headshot, referrals, and sizzle reel) on the very last day.
I’ve written—probably ad nauseum—about the struggle with negative self-talk so many of us experience. As recently as two weeks ago, I shared my “face-plant with a suitcase handle” story, an accident that only occurred because of negative self-talk. I’m proud to say that, while not perfect, I’m improving and have had positive, nurturing, and encouraging conversations with myself over this upcoming IWD event.
I recognize that whether an attendee is a seasoned business owner, an employee, or a young woman with a side hustle she dreams of expanding, every one of them has experienced the loss of joy at some point in her life. I’m honored to offer a talk on fighting to get it back, showcasing stories and strategies for refusing to live a joyless life.
In 2021, I took the risk of sharing my own story of losing and recapturing joy in my memoir, Don’t Fight Mad. What started out as a little self-help book using martial arts as a metaphor for life morphed into a memoir/self-help/inspiration tome where I took the darkest parts of my life, along with stories of other people I know, and turned them into a paean to joy.
Words matter, and writing those stories has mattered to many people. I remember the day after I published the book, I had terrible second thoughts. I was horrified that I’d been so transparent, so vulnerable. What have I done? I wondered. And while there were some negative experiences (remind me to tell you about the woman I met who gushed about how the book helped her heal…from her affair with my then-husband), there have been far more positive comments from women who thanked me for my honesty and bravery.
Today I took a long walk on the beach. While I walked, I spoke out loud the words I plan to share during my presentation. I played with phrasing, sifted through the hundreds of stories I have to illustrate each point, and finished just as I reached the steps from the sand to the road across from my house. As I walked home, it occurred to me yet again that joy isn’t a guarantee. Too often we fight for prestige, for money, for position, or other transient things. We content ourselves with the momentary sparkle of happiness.
But once we have experienced it, once we’ve tasted the incomparable nectar of true joy, we cannot settle for less.
Life is hard. Bad things happen. We make terrible decisions. Ugliness abounds. And yet…if you’re in the fray, be encouraged and don’t give up. Keep fighting.
Why? Because we all deserve joy.
COMMERCIAL BREAK
If you’re in the central Florida area, I’d love to meet you and share more about midlife reinvention and my contemporary romance novels, Bread Pudding in Barcelona and Something Will Sing to Your Heart. It’s never too late to be who you’ve always dreamed of being.
NEARLY SOLD OUT! Keynote, “Fighting for Joy.” Voices of Vision International Women’s Day Conference, 6 March, 8:00 am – 5:00 pm
Venue 142, 142 N Woodland Blvd, DeLand FL 32720
Launch Events for A Thistle in the Cevennes, April dates and locations TBD
Storyteller Summit, 11 April, 11:00 am – 5:00 pm
Oviedo Mall, 1700 Oviedo Mall Blvd, Oviedo FL 32765
The Book End at the Daytona Beach Arts Fest, 12 April, 10:00 am – 4:00 pm
Downtown Daytona Beach, FL
Page & Pen, 3 October, 11:00 am – 5:00 pm
Oviedo Mall, 1700 Oviedo Mall Blvd, Oviedo FL 32765
The Book End at the Halifax Arts Festival, 7-8 November, 9:00 am – 5:00 pm
166 South Beach Street, Daytona Beach, FL
Excited for you and cannot wait to hear how the speaking goes. You will shine!
Busy girl! Great work, Cindy!