The Week That Got Away

Time for a reprise?

Photo by Cara Beth Buie on Unsplash

I had no intention of missing this week. But sometimes life intervenes. 

Between my fast approaching wedding, a hurricane, and a trip to meet my mother in law-to be in West Virginia, writing took a bit of a back seat. 

I don’t think it’s cheating to do something some of my favorite writers have done: reprise a previous post. I’ve had many new readers since the beginning, so perhaps the OG Because Words Matter subscribers will indulge me this week. For newcomers, here’s how it began. The big differences here are that I turned 63 this week and I’m now an 8th degree black belt. Otherwise, nothing has changed. I still believe we owe it to ourselves and the world to be diligent, rigorous thinkers.

Have a blessed week and, if you’re in Helene’s path, I pray for safety. 

____

July 24, 2023

I get bored easily so I do a lot of stuff—I’m an author, a speaker, and a 7^th degree black belt master instructor and owner of an Ernie Reyes West Coast World Martial Arts studio in Austin, Texas. I founded a marketing communications consulting group aptly called Knockout Marketing Strategies. At my core, I’m a storyteller. I believe wholeheartedly in the power of story to move hearts and minds and to inspire action. It’s my hope this Substack newsletter will appeal to others who likewise revere story…and the words they comprise.

I’m also a senior adjunct professor at Concordia University Texas in Austin. I’ve been adjuncting (is that a word?) since 2014, working primarily with undergrads. Whether I’m teaching Business Ethics, Leadership, Fundamentals of Marketing, or Consumer Behavior, I start each class the same way:

I’m not a professor who pretends I don’t have an opinion. I have lots of opinions and I’m not averse to sharing them. However, I couldn’t care less if I tried whether or not you agree with me. I’m not in education to create mirror images of myself. I want to hear your opinions. But—and this is important—you must treat this class like it’s a math class. Which means show your work. Don’t make statements without citing your sources—and it can’t just be that mommy and daddy, or your youth pastor, or your favorite music artist taught you. Tell me why you’ve come to that conclusion. Show me that you’ve exercised critical thinking. Because no matter what the topic of this class is, my goal is that you leave the semester a stronger thinker than when you arrived.

And then I break the class into three groups. I assign each group one of the following problems, telling them to solve for x:

45x² – 3x + 14 = 92

45x² – (3x + 14) = 92

45(x² – 3x) + 14 = 92

Invariably, after 15 minutes, they all (typically business majors) have a variety of answers—or are stumped. When they ask me for the solutions I shrug and tell them I have no idea and honestly don’t care.

Huh?

The point is, each problem has the same components—but the way the problems are set up will dictate the answers. Likewise, when we encounter life problems—like homelessness, ageism, what to wear to the job interview—how we set up our thinking will determine what answers we find.

When we encounter life problems, how we set up our thinking will determine what answers we find

We have to think strategically about how we set up the problem before we dive in with quick and often lazy answers. For instance, at 61 years old, I can listen to people tell me to slow down, stop working so hard, forget about wearing a bikini or training for my next black belt.

Sounds reasonable, right? After all, I’m a grandmother. I could collect Social Security later this year if I were so inclined.

But that’s lazy thinking. Sure, there are plenty of 61 year olds who should slow down. My own mother was diagnosed with the cancer that killed her at 62. But there’s also 100 year old Henry Kissinger who (stick with me—let’s not get into the politics) just went to Beijing to meet with senior officials.

But making a decision based on a single centenarian’s activity could be lazy thinking, too. Instead, choosing how I live my life at the time when I can take advantage of the senior’s discount at the movie theatre requires more thinking. It requires critical thinking. Thinking that sets up the problem so I can find the right answer.

And how I set up the problem is important. Words like “should,” “old,” “senior,” and “grandmother” have their place. So do “black belt,” “enthusiasm,” “passion,” and “courage.”

Because words matter.

Where in your life have you used lazy thinking to decide who and what you “should be”? What are the words you use in the quiet times alone that haven’t served you well? How can you reframe the problem—move around the parentheses—to set yourself up for wild success?

How can you reframe the problem to set yourself up for wild success?

Set up the problem correctly and you’ll find the right answer, the answer that brings you meaning and joy.

As I create these weekly posts, I’m eager to hear from you where you’ll apply new thinking to old problems. Together, let’s think critically and communicate wisely.

Because words matter.